I turned on the TV yesterday at lunch time to watch Dr. Phil and the topic of the show was about the current epidemic of bullying that takes place in school. It troubles me that a number of children in middle school have committed suicide to end the suffering of being bullied in school daily. These kids have been called names like “slut”, “whore”, “faggot”, “freak”, “weirdo” etc. They have been tripped, pushed down the stairs, dumped in the dumpster, beaten up with brass knuckles, some boys even being threatened with rape in the locker room. These kids endure these kinds of treatment from the bullies in school on a daily basis, with no reprieve or respite. The worst thing about it is while all this was happening, the other students merely looked on and did nothing.

This issue is very close to my heart. The core of the issue isn’t about the name calling, the physical abuse or the lack of intervention by bystanders. The core of the issue is not about violence. It is about the fact that these children—the ones who are being picked on and bullied—are just different. The core of the epidemic is that there is a lack of tolerance and acceptance for what is considered different from the ‘accepted norm’.

This epidemic has been around for decades, centuries, possibly even millennia’s. It just shows up dressed in different forms. It shows up as the black and white segregation in the United States more than fifty years ago. It shows up as the Jewish holocaust in World War II. It shows up as apartheid in South Africa. It shows up as homophobia, xenophobia and many other kinds of phobias. It shows up as racism, anti-Semitics-ism and all kinds of –isms. It’s an epidemic that is widespread and dominant in our everyday lives, we just call it by different names. The crux of the matter is that there is a lack of tolerance and acceptance for what is considered different from the accepted norm, which begs the following question:

What IS the accepted norm and who gets to decide it?

Popular culture has been responsible for setting the benchmark for what is acceptable and what is not for decades. In the 1930s, Hitler was responsible for perpetuating the idea that Jews had to be eliminated. Today, the parties that play a similar role take the form of reality TV, magazines and advertising companies with big budgets. The most glaringly obvious example has to do with women’s body image. Fifty years ago, Marilyn Monroe was the poster girl for what was considered sexy, feminine and beautiful. By today’s standard, she would be a size 14. Fast forward to the year 2012, the covers of women’s magazines are graced by size 0 female models who are as thin as a rake, with bones protruding from every part of their bodies. Within the span of fifty years, what is considered ‘beautiful’ has gone through a metamorphosis of 14 dress sizes. This proves the point that the ‘accepted norm’ is a moving target. It is an ever changing, constantly evolving benchmark. The only two constants that define the ‘acceptable norm’ are:

1. The power of influence; and
2. Critical mass.

Hitler had the power of influence and he had the critical mass. The mere mention of his name strikes fear in people’s heart and brings up horrifying images of the Jewish holocaust. Yet, when it comes to reality TV and trashy magazines, society barely bats an eyelid. They both do the same thing—Hitler and the media—the only thing different is their message. One was about ethnic cleansing. The other is about commercializing.

Bullying is a complex subject matter. To generalize a complex subject matter like this and plaster a label over it would make me guilty of the same crime as Hitler and the media. There are many other contributing factors to the bullying epidemic—there are the psychological aspects of it that has to be addressed, there are issues to do with the environment, there is work to be done to empower parents, teachers and children to curb the spreading of this epidemic but in its most basic form, the underlying current of bullying is just this—a lack of tolerance and acceptance. Hitched to that is a lack of compassion and humanity—all of which are values that are important for a healthy, functioning society. All of which can help to eradicate this epidemic but it all has to start at home, with awareness and education.

I ended yesterday watching one of my favourite movies on television last night. It was the movie District 9 set in the backdrop of South Africa, whose plot focused on the relationship between one man and an extra-terrestrial being (colloquially labeled as ‘Prawns’). The inspiration of the movie came from real events that took place in District Six in Cape Town during the apartheid era. The theme of the movie is really about xenophobia and social segregation.

This movie moved me because of the message of humanity it conveys. There is something to be said about seeing a human being extending the same kindness and respect to an extra-terrestrial being despite the obvious differences between the man and the ‘Prawn’. In real life, the ‘Prawns’ are really just a metaphor for those of us who have been discriminated against because we are different in some way. Every one of us, at some point in our lives, has been a ‘Prawn’ living in our own version of District 9. Irrespective of our differences in race, religion, ideology, beliefs, size or sexuality, we all belong to one race—the human race. When you really think about it, every member of the human race is different. There are no two people on this earth who are exactly alike. If you don’t believe this, just look down at your own hands. Nature proves this by giving us our own unique set of finger prints. We are not meant to be the same. That is what we should be celebrating, not discriminating against.